Do you sometimes hear “that click”?

switch click

Tennessee Williams knew what that “click” was when writing his play “Cat on a Hot Tin Roof”. Following is an excerpt:

Brick: Somethin’ hasn’t happened yet.
Big Daddy: What’s that?
Brick: A click in my head.
Big Daddy: Did you say “click”?
Brick: Yes sir, the click in my head that makes me feel peaceful.
Big Daddy: Boy, sometimes you worry me.
Brick: It’s like a switch, clickin’ off in my head. Turns the hot light off and the cool one on, and all of a sudden there’s peace.

What the character Brick was talking about was how he feels when he drinks enough alcohol to put him in a state he calls “peace”.  The stress, regret, guilt and other feelings he experiences is turned off by that symbolic “click”. Of course I hope no one relies on any drug like alcohol to get it. From my experience, that “click” Brick describes becomes harder and harder to obtain in drug dependence and abuse, but I know that it is possible for me (and others) without such negative crutches.

Today I experienced such a “click” in my head. Things that seemed hard suddenly feel easy. The weight lifted off my shoulders. Happiness came out of nowhere in a flash. I feel like I can fly. Everything is brighter. There is a delightful coolness running through my veins. I feel that symbolic hand pushing me forward, and I’m starting to float. I think I finally know the direction. The direction is to the right place, at the right time. I won’t give it a name. It doesn’t need one. It just lives.

This feeling started for me at about 11 am when I entered the hair salon. I knew that when I walked out I’d feel beautiful, and I did. Then soon after I saw a person that means a lot to me, and I knew when he saw me he’d recognize the light in my eyes immediately. And he did.

I don’t really care where this is leading, but I’m enjoying the ride. How long it will last, I do not know. I’m going to share this feeling with others tonight. I think I’ll be the star of the show. For some reason I go to that place when I’m feeling like this. I almost believe that it will rub off on others. It’s contagious sometimes. Happiness can be contagious. Confidence can be contagious.

I do feel like I have a special power right now.

Tonight when I see my husband he might also see this light in my eyes. I know what he’ll say. “Uh oh! Did you take your evening meds?” Well, where I plan to go I can’t quite yet, but I will. And when I do, the click may likely switch to the off position. If it doesn’t then I’ll be saying my favorite words.

“Green peppers, yellow peppers, orange peppers, purple peppers, red peppers, white peppers, hot peppers, pickled peppers, pimento peppers, ahhhhhhhhh! PEPPERS!!!!!!!!!”

colored peppers

“Cindy, take your Seroquel prn.”

Off


Another take on catapult.

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7 thoughts on “Do you sometimes hear “that click”?

  1. modoyle May 24, 2017 / 9:12 am

    Hi enjoyed reading and I did get that click from alcohol.
    I’ve been in Rehab for addiction to alcohol, cocaine and other street drugs.
    I’m no longer addicted to anything.
    I’ve recovered from Borderline Personality Disorder and my professional team treat my bipolar disorder without medication as I was so suicidal on medication.
    Today I live a wonderful life and deal with the highs and lows of Bipolar in my own personal and healthy way.
    Cheers Mo X

    Liked by 1 person

    • updownflight May 24, 2017 / 11:52 am

      That’s great news how well you have recovered, Mo! Thank you for sharing that. I, too, managed to stop drinking. I remember the “click” I got from drinking, too, but I also get that click when suddenly depression or oversedation disappears, and when hypomania/mania kicks in.

      Liked by 1 person

      • modoyle May 24, 2017 / 12:51 pm

        Hi I manage my highs and lows with joy now, if you can understand that?
        I’ve discovered myself and it took a long time.
        Now I’m not sedated and am more creative and loving and have made new healthy friends, who tell me I’m fun to be around.
        Listen take care of yourself, the medication works for most.
        For myself I was only suicidal on it and now am no longer suicidal and I took a risk coming off it cold turkey and I wouldn’t recommend it to anyone.
        The risk worked for me and thanks for reading.
        Cheers and love Mo

        Liked by 1 person

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