Getting where I need to be. Moving slowly but surely.

catapult

I’m like a turtle sitting in its box, or at the least slowly making its way to a not so obvious destination, and then returning home in frustration.

I am slowed down not just from my general condition, but a chemical fix that is meant to keep me sedated and calm. Unfortunately this fix slows me down more than I’d wish. I try to push myself. Or maybe sometimes there’s an invisible slow-moving hand pushing me forward, with my feet and belly sliding on the ground.

turtle in shellAll of a sudden, and out of nowhere, I become catapulted and fly 100 mph into a random direction. During my flight I see, smell, hear and feel all sorts of things passing me by like a dream. Then I land at some random destination. I look around and  don’t know where I am. I’ve forgotten the things in the dream. I don’t know what to do at this new place. I want to find my way back home by instinct, but the journey feels monumental. I take one step after another, but I grow tired. I yearn for my box. I know it is safe there and I can relax and meditate. Then it gets to the point where I’m on my hands and knees crawling. Along the way, I feel desperate and cover my head with my arms, imagining I’ve reached my box, but I’ve not.

drag
Dragging me back to my safe spot

Eventually someone or something grabs my arms and drags me home, with my body bumping over rocks and mounds. I then sit there, recovering and relieved, but I know I must start walking again to that unknown destination. I’m again walking very slowly, hoping for a minor push this time instead of a catapult. I also yearn for a whisper, containing the name of where I’m going and what I should do when I get there.

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9 thoughts on “Getting where I need to be. Moving slowly but surely.

  1. Nel May 23, 2017 / 5:16 pm

    Keep your head up! And I hope this makes you smile because today is World Turtle Day so your turtle analogy is completely awesome!

    Liked by 1 person

    • updownflight May 23, 2017 / 5:26 pm

      World Turtle Day? Hooray! That’s so nice. Thank you for letting us all know, Nel. I looked it up and learned that World Turtle Day was established because of the threats to these wonderful animals as a result of illegal trafficking. I hope measures will be taken to stop those practices. If people see turtles at risk of harm, please be careful help them out.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Nel May 23, 2017 / 5:31 pm

        It is nice! I have a painted turtle and I just love them all even the humans that feel like turtles some days 🙂 Rooting for you always!

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Hussein Allam May 23, 2017 / 7:53 pm

    Our hope is our catapult, great post! Keep going on, you are amazing, and full of experience, updownflight🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • updownflight May 23, 2017 / 7:57 pm

      Thanks, Hussein Allam. And what a wonderful and true thing you just wrote about hope being our catapult.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Hussein Allam May 23, 2017 / 8:04 pm

        Most welcome, I don’t know why I keep starring at your blogs and keep reading it, it is something real, I like reading real stories from your real experience, because you are rich of experience incidents.!as a result, I might learn something from you , and how to surpass obstacles🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • updownflight May 23, 2017 / 8:11 pm

        You are a dear follower, and I so much enjoy the wonderful wisdom you share on your blog. I guess I do some rich past experiences, but I have been a bit stalled for a while in some respects. I’ve been doing a lot of soul searching and recovery these past years. I hope that in the near future my experience will grow.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Hussein Allam May 23, 2017 / 8:21 pm

        Thanks for the compliment😊, however, I feel that from the way of your writing. That you are passing in a serious journey in life, hope everything will get back to the right track, as you wish, have the patience 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

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