Finally feeling freed from the memory of my first depression

I did something, a bit ago, that I feel quite good about. I’ll mention it in the form of a story, for anyone who wishes to read it.

When I was 16 years old, I had just experienced the first severe depression of my life. I nearly flunked the year at school because I skipped many days, hiding secretly at home. When it was realized, I was more punished and scolded, than comforted…for feeling so ill. Some of what triggered the depression had to do with ballet, and my seemingly squashed dreams of becoming a serious ballet dancer. The rest was just the inevitable onset of a disorder destined to show itself, anyway.

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More than 10 Varieties of Czech Christmas Cookies (České Vánoční Cukroví), plus

This post from 2019 has been my most viewed this past month. I am thinking that with more people home during the pandemic, Christmas cookie baking has become an extra popular activity. For that reason, I thought I would share this post again here on WordPress. Enjoy!

Bird Flight

Christmas cookie platter 2018 metal (2) My 2018 Christmas cookie platter. Not all Czech cookies in this post are shown above.

This post marks the end of my Czech Christmas cookie countdown. Phew! On November 11th, I posted my first of 10 Czech Christmas cookie/confection recipes, with my last posted yesterday, along with a bonus Czech sweet bread. According to my husband, my mother-in-law would make as many as 13 different varieties for their platter. Frankly, I can’t manage all of that baking!

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Weeks 6 & 7 – Friday Fitness & Weight Loss Restart (Hectic, but some good results)

I’m sorry I missed last week’s update. The past two weeks have been ultra-hectic. I confess that some of the days I neglected to track my meals. I also ate some things that I wouldn’t normally eat during this effort. I didn’t go too overboard. See what happened below:

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Revisiting a place from childhood with the mind of an experienced adult

weeping willow
A healthy weeping willow standing tall on a green

I woke up at about 5 am this morning feeling very well. Unlike usual Saturdays, I prepared breakfast early at 6:30 am. Luckily my hubby didn’t mind. Then after a bit of cuddling, I took a long and thorough shower and did lots of other beauty-related self care in preparation for my 30th high school reunion today. Whoa! How time flies! Continue reading

Disabling Aspects of Bipolar Disorder – Energy levels, moods, and/or cognitive issues

Energy levels and more

One of the more disabling aspects of bipolar disorder, for me, is fluctuating energy levels. I’ve learned that this is a key aspect of my disorder and is often (not always) at the root of many of my symptoms. However, I don’t believe it is as simple as that for many of us, unless one has an extremely “classic” form of bipolar disorder, which seems less common that once thought.

In an article on MentalHelp.net, energy levels in bipolar disorder are emphasized. It’s a fairly simple explanation, in terms of causation of various mood symptoms, though I see it as a starting point in understanding the complexity of how bipolar disorder affects many sufferers. It reads: Continue reading

Waiting for a strong wind current to lift me up to soar again.

Bird with air

It’s obviously been ages since I wrote anything for my blog. I have a feeling that some of my old blog friends have either moved on, or likely forgot about me. I understand that. I regret that I haven’t kept up with any of your blogs lately, either.

This post is not about writer’s block. This post is about feeling uncomfortable about blogging for various reasons. Firstly, my blog started to become a weight loss blog, to a degree. That was all well and good for a while, but when I “fell off the diet wagon” I wanted to run away from that. I didn’t really want my blog to be a diet blog. If you are following my blog just for that reason, I understand if you wish to unfollow me. Please don’t respond to this post with any diet cheerleading. I don’t want it right now. Continue reading

US citizens – Please vote, if you can!

Your vote countsI’d like to urge everyone of age in the USA, whose eligible, to vote. Today (Tuesday, November 6, 2018) is Election Day in the USA. There are many issues that affect those like me with mental illness or other illnesses, significantly. Or ones that don’t now, may very well in years to come. No matter what your priorities are, everyone’s vote makes a difference. Not voting is often regrettable. Around 40% or more eligible voters don’t vote. Imagine that! That’s horrible that non voters’ interests aren’t represented!

Not registered to vote? Though in some states it’s too late to register on election day, in several states there is same day registration that makes it possible. See http://www.ncsl.org/research/electio…istration.aspx for details. If it is too late in your state, please consider registering as soon as possible, so you can vote in the next election.

Don’t know where to vote? Visit  https://www.vote.org/polling-place-locator/ to find out.

Weeks 22 to 30 – Friday Fitness and Weight Loss Update

Hello again

Main Topic: Totally falling off the weight loss effort wagon

One of my main purposes in creating these Friday Fitness and Weight Loss updates was to stay mindful of my eating and exercise, or lack thereof. I promised to post these updates every week with only exceptions for vacations, sickness, or emergencies. I, obviously, did not keep that promise. With this update, you’ll see that seven weeks have past since I reported on these efforts. Yes, I “fell off the wagon”. I’m here now, though. I won’t claim to be currently vigilant about the effort, but I’m being mindful about it again. Below you’ll see a bit what happened since August 31, 2018. Continue reading

Pluck me from this horrid place

Oh, please! One day may we find the key that fits!

Bird Flight

key in door

Pluck me from this horrid place that I have lived in for so long. No, not from my literal home with you, my love, but from the jail of its inner rooms.

You know the jail itself is solely in my brain. Outside with you are miles of beauty. And yet you only ever look through my jail window at me, saturated by grey and black. Though I do see a glimpse of the outside beauty past your face, it seems surreal and distant. Your face looks sad and frustrated. I kiss it through the jail window, but we both want more.

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MC, Day 4: Pump up the Jam

Have you been watching the news lately? If so, there’s been a lot of talk about women being victimized at drunken parties in high school and college. Or women victimized by stars like Bill Cosby, formerly thought of as a “Sweet Dad” figure. I’m not a judge, and I’m not part of a jury regarding the person(s) in the news, but I can tell you that I know such victimizations do indeed happen, and a lot! I’m reblogging my story below from a long time ago. I was extremely lucky! Many girls/women (and sometimes the occasional guy) aren’t so lucky. At the time, I knew I might have escaped something potentially bad, but I didn’t think much more of it for long afterwards. Now I’m thinking about people who weren’t so lucky.

Though I didn’t suffer any major consequences the day I drank illegally in the story below, what was done to me was still a crime. I don’t happen to remember any faces or names from that night, other than perhaps the face and name of my freshman year roommate. If I did, I would be severely unhappy with them. Would I have reported them if I did? I don’t know. Actually, I kind of doubt it. But if I did know the person’s name who put that drug into my drink, and later learned that person lied about having done a crime to the whole world, I would say something.

Bird Flight

dance party 1

OK, anyone who has read any or all of my Five-Day Music Challenge posts is going to scratch their head about this one. I’m scratching my head as I type it. Yes, this is updownflight writing this.

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